Dear_Sis@the_end_of_my_day.calm©
Two sisters and their friends, share the joys of Larchmont motherhood through E-mail.

by Val Estabrook

Date: 11/20/03
To: Barbara
      Ann
      Jillian
      Michele
      Emily
      Entire Book Club
From: Val
Subject: Another holiday, another piercing

Input. Need it. Before you pull those candied yams from oven…email Thanksgiving advice to ol’half-baked bird. While knitting rear portion of turkey together to hold stuffing, can’t stop thinking of Kyle’s left ear also pierced multiple times to hold…my attention.

I like men w/an earring. I do. It’s Joe who objects. Then Kyle turned 18. Unknown to me, Joe gave the green light. Kyle emailed following week:

Not angry, just surprised. However…since then there’s been another ear piercing slightly above last. Two piercings, second w/out permission. Told Kyle…enough. “Really?” he asked. Really.

So far it’s cosmetic but more will seem psychotic. Don’t you agree?

xoVal

PS
Kim, see you @ 4. Don’t forget yams…pour little brown sugar and extra bourbon on top. Kyle arrives home in an hour.

To: Val
From: Barbara
Subject: Turkey dressing vs. tongue piercing

Similar to a tongue piercing, my turkey isn’t pretty…but it’s done. And not unlike our college age daughter, my newly sprouting grey hair is well beyond my personal control. Val, these kids are 18 years old.

Turn to your sister for guidance…for I’m one sorry excuse for a parent. Lost it yesterday… again…when Elizabeth-darling emailed w/news of yet another piercing…her fifth. While this may be a misguided cry for more jewelry, her daddy says tough love is now required. Ian suggests w/each new piercing of cartilage, Elizabeth forfeit one limb. I suggested we follow a harsher course: w/each new mutilation comes a 25% cutoff of perforated daughter’s discretionary funds.

Emailed Elizabeth w/new guidelines. Uneasy calm prevails. One can almost hear the hum...the disconcerting drone of an electric razor as Elizabeth buzz cuts the left side of her head.

I may become religious. I need to be saved.

Barbara

Val and Kim illustrations by Larchmont artist Sue Girardi.
" Barbara" from: www.acn.net.au/ebusiness/ manual/chapter6.htm

Print This Page--For best results, use landscape option in Preferences
Email this article